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Expert Q&A

	By Adolph Brown Psychologist

I am the mother of twins. They were born at 34 weeks and via C-section. I worry that I don't have that mother-baby bond with them. Is it normal, as the mother of multiples, to feel like you aren't giving them the attention a single baby gets, or that you don't have that bond with them? I don't get to hold them when I am feeding them, because they want to eat at the same time most of the time. Is this all normal? I love my children and want in the future for them to want Mom when they are scared, happy, hurt anything. I want them to want their mom and know I love them. Is there something I can do to ensure they know I love them? I spend as much time with them as possible, but I work outside the home full time, too.?

Often times the issue with providing "enough" love and attention for children is more of a concern for parents than it is for young persons. Every parent can love their children equally but hardly the same way. Each child is an individual and has unique needs and ways of responding to their environment. I compliment you for spending as much time with your children as possible. One cannot give more than is possible. Therefore, the quality of time becomes more important than the quantity of time. Remember to continue to take care of yourself (relax, give yourself breaks), as families are an integrated experience whereby the health of one will impact the health of others on some level.

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