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Expert Q&A

	By Kate Cohen-Posey Therapist

I have identical twin girls. They were born on September 11, 2001, so they get attention for their birthday and because they are identical. We also have a 6-year-old daughter. She is very jealous of the twins. They get all the attention, between being identical and their birthday. Many times we will be out, and she will say, 'Mom, they did not even see me!' That hurts. What can I do?

What?s important is that she is telling you that it hurts. Let her know that jealously is a perfectly normal feeling, and any time she feels upset, you would be glad for her to tell you.

At the same time, you do have a very unusual situation – having twins born on the day the twin towers fell. As much as you can, explain that everyone is fascinating, but that people tend to notice unusual things. Tell her if she wants some of her sisters' attention, she can be their ?business manager.÷ Whenever anyone asks questions about the twins, tell them your 6-year-old is their business manager and that she will answer all the questions. This might allow her to share the limelight of your family?s unusual blessing.

Kate Cohen-Posey, LMHC LMFT,
Author of How to Handle Bullies, Teasers and Other Meanies

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