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Nice Teens Do Brag

Expert Advice From Communication Coach Peggy Klaus

By Tamekia Reece

You've probably told your teen it isn't nice to brag, but next time your teen's going on and on about his greatness, and you're prepared to utter those words, don't. Bragging can actually be a key tool in your teen's success – if done right. Read on to learn why and how to teach effective bragging techniques to your teen.

You may be wondering why your teen would even need to brag. After all, she has aunts, uncles, other family members, friends and, of course, you, quickly singing her praises. But Peggy Klaus, communication and leadership coach and author of Brag! The Art Of Tooting Your Own Horn Without Blowing It (Warner Books, 2003), says as kids get older it becomes increasingly important for them to be able to talk about themselves.

"For many, it's a harsh wake-up call when Mom or Dad aren't there anymore, leading the cheerleading squad and doing the talking for them," Klaus says. "That's when kids come face-to-face with the real world and have to learn to toot their own horns."

As teens get closer to college life and the working world, knowing how to self-promote can make the road much easier. It can help when they're applying for colleges, financial aid, summer internships, jobs or even when they're aiming to become a part of different social groups, like a fraternity or sorority.

School and career aren't the only instances where bragging can be a big help, though. It can also help to boost your teen's self-esteem and confidence. Klaus says the lowest point of self-esteem in a person's life is usually during the teen years, "and being able to reflect on what it is that you can do well and being able to talk about it is really important in terms of boosting self-esteem." The more your teen boosts his self-esteem, the more confidence he'll have to try new things. By trying those new things, it's very possible he'll gain new accomplishments to brag about.

Want to see more?

• Grunts, Snarls and Verbal Abuse: How to Break the Silence and Poor Communication Patterns
• Learning the Lingo: Does Your Teen Have a Secret Language?
• Skeletons in the Closet: Telling Your Kids About Your Past
• Talk about it!