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Built-in Playmates
Encouraging Positive, Cooperative Play By Heather Johnson Durocher
Certain activities cleaning up toys, bath time and getting ready for bed are times when Wrinkle says her twins work especially well together. As they read books at night, for example, they'll settle quietly on the floor and not necessarily fight for Mom's or Dad's lap, she says. Also, one sibling might make the gesture of getting a pacifier for the other.
Modeling positive partnerships is important, adds Wrinkle, who tries to do this with her husband, John.
"I think more than anything, if you're lucky enough to have a partner or at least two adults in the household, you should interact well together," she says. "John and I play with the kids, but we'll play with each other in the same room so the kids see that. We really try to lead by example."
Providing toys that are similar yet different is the answer, say parents and experts.
"If you're going to get three trucks for triplets, get three different trucks and hope something stands out," Wagner says.
O'Brien says she's seen her own twins benefit from this approach, which she began early on. Now, her sons Alex and Matthew understand the importance of sharing and working together to solve issues and problems.