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Built-in Playmates
Encouraging Positive, Cooperative Play By Heather Johnson Durocher
Still, remembering that twins or triplets are individuals is important when engaging them in play, says Maureen O'Brien, Ph.D., a developmental psychologist who teaches at Bentley College in Waltham, Mass., and the mother of 8-year-old twin boys.
"Try to bring them together every once in awhile, but just because they're twins or triplets doesn't mean they want to do the same things," she says. "Parents have to put the brake on their own expectations."
Activities that feature multiple characters, such as a game of dress-up in Mommy's or Daddy's clothes and shoes, a puppet show using stuffed animals or a rendition of Ring-Around-the-Rosy also are good ways of encouraging cooperative play.
Parents can suggest such activities, but usually play is most successful when the children come up with an idea themselves. Haller found this to be the case with Ray and Dan, who have been known to act out situations and people they know using their trains and trucks.
"I'd always seen the boys play with trucks and trains and wondered how it could be interesting for so long," Haller says. "But they were using the trucks to play out social situations: 'Here's the mommy truck, here's the daddy truck, and they're going here.' The trucks have personalities. They like to pretend to be people they know, like family members or the next door neighbor's grandkids."
Briggen Wrinkle's 2-year-old twins, a boy named Corbin and a girl named Carter, entertain each other during grocery store trips. With one on her back and the other in the shopping cart, "They tend to talk the whole time, laugh and look around the store," says the Chicago mom. "I'm totally left out."