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Homecoming for Twins

Making New Family Connections

By Laura Cone

You've got a stockpile of cloth diapers, plenty of socks, even a battery-driven mobile that plays tunes to keep your twins entertained. You are seeing double when it comes to major purchases: two bouncy chairs, two cribs, two highchairs and two car seats.

When it comes to bringing twins home, it's important to prepare not just the physical space of your house for the big homecoming but the emotional space of your existing family as well.

Kathy Schmitt of Elgin, Ill., a member of the Double Love Mothers of Twins club, had daughter, 3-year-old Sarah, when she brought home fraternal twins, Grace and Rachel. She talked to Sarah about how she could hold her new siblings but only with adult supervision. She also prepared Sarah for the fact her newborn siblings would spend most of their time crying, sleeping and eating with little time for playing or visiting during the early months.

Schmitt also made sure Sarah would not feel left out but would bond with the babies right from the start. "We let her go to the gift shop at the hospital before she came up to see the twins and myself, and we let her pick out something for the twins," she says. "Warren, my husband, gave her some ideas, but it was her choice what she wanted to bring her two new sisters. Before the twins were born, I had picked out two presents the twins could give her when she walked in the door."

Schmitt says the nurses let her older daughter take photographs with her new twin sisters. "One of the twins gave her a T-shirt that said 'She's the big sister,'" says Schmitt, adding the other twin gave her a magnetic drawing toy.

The best advice she followed was to let the older sibling show her interest in the newborn twins in her own time. Instead of fussing over the newborns, make sure to give your direct attention to the older child when he or she visits you in the hospital, Schmitt says. Her daughter immediately bonded with her little sisters in the hospital cribs.

Want to see more?

• Check out our Article Library.
• Early Arrivals: Our Experiences with Premature Twins
• Preparing for Twins: Practical Advice Every Parent Should Know
• Preparing for Twins: A Dad of Multiples Shares His Advice on the Early Days of Fatherhood
• Talk about it!

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