- my iParenting
- quick clicks
- twins today articles
- twins today q&a
- community & groups
- research baby names
- prepare a birth plan
- content channels
- ip channel rss feeds
- read birth stories
- read parenting stories
- recommended books
- e-newsletters
- safety recalls
- ip diaries
- ip store
- mom of the month
- dad of the month
- editor's letter
- letters to the editor
From Our Sponsors
- e-newsletters
- Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters
- award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Double Trouble
5 Tips to Tackle Twin Fighting By Alexandria Powell
"Generally, clear verbal limits (no hitting, no biting) and consistently administered time-outs will reduce physical aggression, especially if children are taught alternative skills for cooperating and sharing," Hazzard says.
If the fight hasn't become physical, your children may be able to work through their own problems. After all, your multiples are going to have to negotiate with each other for the rest of their lives, so it's important for them to learn how to deal with disagreements, Pearlman says.
How do you know when to step in, and when to stand back? Observe carefully. Younger twins need more help such as verbal cues ('Remember, no hitting!') and modeling of behavior such as taking a toy back from the other twin. As your children grow, you can observe more and intercede less, Pearlman says.
A new system has been helping keep the peace. "[As] the fights were primarily about someone feeling slighted, we set up 'special days,'" Kirk says. "They alternate days that are their 'special days', and on those days, the special person gets to help set out breakfast, get the mail, sit in the blue chair, say the prayer at mealtime and anything else that's routine. It has really reduced the number of fights."
Although you can't prevent every squabble, there are some things you can do to keep the bloodshed around your house to a minimum: