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When Relatives Come Bearing Gifts...
and Gifts ... and Gifts By Christina Vercelletto
"Far too many parents try to prove they are good parents by being 'providers' rather than parents," says Billingham. "They think, 'See what a good parent I am because I provide all of these things for my children.'"
"Overindulgence leads the child to develop a sense of entitlement: 'I am entitled to whatever it is I want,'" says Billingham.
He explains that the sense of entitlement is bad enough in childhood, but becomes even more serious in young adulthood, when it can be extended to relationships.
The first step in reversing the trend is examining why you buy into it. Maybe you felt deprived as a child? Are you feeling pressured by your child to keep up with the other parents on the block? Try to understand your child's motivation as well. More than likely, it is advertising and/or a desire to have what a friend has, the experts say.
There is always the option of going cold turkey. "Take one holiday season out of a lifetime and take a moratorium on holiday gifts," says Chasen.