- my iParenting
- quick clicks
- twins today articles
- twins today q&a
- community & groups
- research baby names
- prepare a birth plan
- content channels
- ip channel rss feeds
- read birth stories
- read parenting stories
- recommended books
- e-newsletters
- safety recalls
- ip diaries
- ip store
- mom of the month
- dad of the month
- editor's letter
- letters to the editor
From Our Sponsors
- e-newsletters
- Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters
- award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Talk Your Way Into the New Year
The 10 Best Things to Say to Your Partner
By Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller
Asking, "What's your opinion?" communicates that you want to see the situation through your partner's eyes. You're delivering the message: I'm interested in you. I want to hear your ideas, thoughts and opinions.
"What's your opinion?" can serve two purposes. One is to elicit information from your partner that will help you arrive at a mutually agreeable decision about an area of concern to you both. The other is to open a dialogue that will help you think through the process of a personal decision and reach your own conclusion. Either way, "What's your opinion?" helps your partner feel valued, loved and appreciated.
Everyone likes to be noticed. You like to be noticed. Your partner likes to be noticed. I don't need to be noticed, you may be thinking. If so, pay attention to your reaction the next time you enter the room and your partner continues to read the paper without even looking up at you. Think about how you feel when you suggest an idea at a committee meeting and no one responds to it. If you're like most people, you begin to feel invisible, unimportant, undervalued.
To notice your partner is to affirm his or her existence and importance in your life. It acknowledges their presence and communicates that they are valued and appreciated.
You are not being an imposition when you ask for help. On the contrary, you are giving your partner a gift. You are gifting her with an opportunity to contribute, to feel valuable, to return the help that you have given in the past.