- my iParenting
- quick clicks
- twins today articles
- twins today q&a
- community & groups
- research baby names
- prepare a birth plan
- content channels
- ip channel rss feeds
- read birth stories
- read parenting stories
- recommended books
- e-newsletters
- safety recalls
- ip diaries
- ip store
- mom of the month
- dad of the month
- editor's letter
- letters to the editor
From Our Sponsors
- e-newsletters
- Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters
- award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
10 Guiding Principles
Strategies to Change Your Teen's Thinking and Preempt Crises
By Mimi Doe
Parents have to be willing to shift the rules and become more flexible so their kids can mature into their fully-realized selves. By the time children reach their teen years, parents have gotten complacent about setting rules and creating family guidelines. The revisiting of these parameters provides important perceptions of safety and predictability so teens can function freely.
Principle 8: Be What You Want to See
Teenage Research Unlimited found that 70 percent of teenagers name their mom or dad as the person they most admire. Parents need to realize that who we are is much more important than what we say during these years. Teens, while unwilling to listen to our words of wisdom, learn volumes from observing us, even when we think they're not paying the remotest attention. Principle 9: Let Go and Trust
Everyone hits rough patches in parenting, and they can occur almost daily during adolescence. But it is critical during these most trying of times to release our own feelings of shame, guilt, frustration and pain and remember that we are in spiritual partnership with our teenagers. By letting go of the feelings of struggle, we can strengthen ourselves in the peace of trust. Trust, while still keeping a watchful eye. Principle 10: Each Day Offers a Possibility of Renewal
Beginning anew means making small changes in the right direction, rather than quantum leaps toward a perfect relationship. It is truly the small day-to-day stuff that can shift a tense relationship with your teen: one thoughtful compliment a day, replacing irritation with understanding or suggesting options rather than insisting upon specific solutions. Just when you've been counting the months until they leave the nest, suddenly a whole new direction takes root and you can enjoy your precious and rebellious teen.