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One After Two

Getting Your Twins Ready for the New Baby

By Cara Stevens

Bringing home a new baby is a big milestone in a family's life. Add an older set of twins into the mix and you'll find that some of the burdens appear to increase exponentially.

Feeling overwhelmed and sleep-deprived is par for the course for any parent of a newborn. Plus, with a third baby in the family, you're suddenly outnumbered, too! But don't despair, adding a third sibling can be easier in some ways as well.

Going from one to two children, parents must learn to multitask, split their attention and deal with the challenges of bringing up each child as a unique and special individual. Parents of twins already have a huge head start on mastering those skills!

"Having a singleton after multiples is wonderful!" says Dr. Rebecca Moskwinski, executive vice president of the National Organization of Mothers of Twins Clubs as well as the mother of twins and four singletons. "It is so much easier. When you have fed the baby – you're done! When you've changed him – you're done! (Unlike with twins when it seems you are never finished!) I got to hold him a lot more since there was just one of him. Plus, the twins were used to sharing Mom and Dad with someone else, so it wasn't as much of a shock to them."

Plus, your twins also already have a built-in best friend for life, and that can really work in your favor as you begin to need more time to tend to the new baby. "Your twins will enjoy playing together and keeping themselves busy," says Kira Copperman, mother of twins, Joshua and Alex, 6, and Noah, 3. "The unique bond is really a plus, and you should use it to your advantage."

If you need some time alone with the baby, set aside some quiet toys for independent play, and your children can entertain each other while you are feeding, changing or putting the baby down for a nap. If you want to get the children involved with baby care, assign each child an age-appropriate and personality-appropriate role, such as getting diapering supplies, singing to the baby, turning on the mobile or even taking care of baby dolls of their own.

Want to see more?

• Help Is on the Way: Getting the Support You Need to Raise Twins
• Start the New Year Right: Resolutions for Mothers of Multiples
• You Can Do It! 10 Secrets to Surviving the First Year With Twins
• Talk about it!

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