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Not Just Alike

When Identical Twins Look Different

By Carma Haley Shoemaker

Pages:  1  2  3  4  

  • Find a solution. What options are available to help with this change? What can you do to help? What does the twin who is considered less attractive need to help improve her self-image? Once a solution is found and the twin knows it can be "fixed," it may lessen the urgency of the situation.
  • It is important to remember that twins are connected in a way singletons cannot understand. So when attempting to address an issue regarding one twin, including the second twin is almost a must.

    "Parents can help the most by ensuring that the twins are included in this issue as a unit," says Gross. "Twins see themselves as a unit ... which is why any major appearance difference is such an issue. By addressing the issue seriously, not belittling what either twin is feeling and helping to find the root of the problem and the solution, parents can help both twins come to feel that they are a unit once again."

    One woman was even willing to undergo major surgery on the national television show The Extreme Make Over to be and look more like her twin sister. And according to Dr. Antell, this is not unusual.

    "I recently did a rhinoplasty [nose reconstruction] on teenaged twin boys," says Dr. Antell. "While the differences were minimal, each instructed me that they wanted to look like their brother. It was very important that the surgery was done in a way that resulted in their likeness to each other. There is a lot of psychological influences involved in twins, and the effects of one being known as the 'pretty one' or more attractive or for that matter, different in any way affects them both. It is the mystery that is the life of twins."

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