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One of Each

Expecting Boy/Girl Twins

By Alexandria Powell

Most boy/girl twins start out their lives sharing a room. If you're having trouble deciding on d袯r, Lyons advises considering whether you are going to keep them together long term. "A lot of parents who plan to keep their boy/girl twins together long term divide the room, making one side extra frilly and girly and one side super boyish," she says. "This can be really cute, but if you don't plan to have them together long term, choose a practical, gender-neutral option – anything that is not definitively pink or blue."

Schacknies designed her own twin bedding using fabric with an antique toy pattern. "The fabric had shades of mauve and blue that were so perfect for both," says Schacknies, who planned to make both crib sets as well as room accessories from the fabric. However, her little ones arrived early at 33 weeks gestation, and Schacknies' aunt had to finish the sets for her.

In the first weeks and months with baby twins, you'll probably be too busy to notice differences in the way the world treats them. However, stereotypes still exist and can begin coming into play in your children's lives much earlier than you may expect.

Schacknies was surprised to find that her husband had issues with treating the children differently. "He is more accepting of our daughter's fussy times than our son's, and he tends to lose patience more quickly with our son as well," she says. "I think it will become a problem if it continues. The children will certainly notice it." Schacknies notes that she and her husband are working on this issue together, and she brings it to his attention – gently – when it happens.

"It's easy to fall prey to steretypes when dealing with opposite-sex twins," says Pearlman. "People think the boy will be tougher and the girl more sensitive or that the girl will have better language skills and the boy will be more physical. But that's not always the case."

Want to see more?

• My Hands Are Full? Stupid Things People Say to the Parents of Twins
• The Home Stretch: Surviving the Last Trimester With Twins
• Preparing for Twins: Practical Advice Every Parent Should Know
• Talk about it!

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